Surely sugar
She sweetly said,
Solemnly smiling –
She submitted herself
To his shame,
his secrets and sin –
She was his
Symbol,
His
Sacrament,
sketched into his soul
She swayed with him
In a sorrowful symphony –
His sneer
From under the sheets
Saluted her surrender
Her sacrifice of self
She seemed
Blissful,
simply -
her!
Subconsciously,
She swayed another
Stirring within
something sinister,
slithering,
hissing
with self-reproach
remorse…
Surreal
shine sun
spilled over the horizon
and sunk in the sea.
Serenity -
Slowly she swayed
Somewhere, somewhere
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
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Wow, this is great! All those S sounds sound like a snake hissing. Even the shape of the poem resembles a snake! Love it!
ReplyDeleteSoulfully satisfying!
ReplyDeleteLove the S's and the title is really cool!!
ReplyDeleteStupendous scripting with S!
ReplyDeleteIT’S NOT FUNNY . . . OR IS IT?
Nice work - it's a lovely piece. I particularly like the repetition of somewhere in the last line - it takes on a life of its own.
ReplyDeleteSimply stunning.
ReplyDeleteYou can find all the prompt site news on my blog.
thank you everyone for your comments are very much appreciated, just coming out of my writing hibernation and happy i was not laughed off the website :)
ReplyDeleteSizzling!
ReplyDeleteJazzy Z
very clever!
ReplyDeletequite intriguing! and all those S's keep you on the edge. lovely.
ReplyDelete